Today we celebrated my daughter's 7th birthday! The transition from baby girl to big girl is inevitable. But with each passing year my heart is full of more gratitude than it was the year before. Most mom's experience bitter sweet emotions at the thought and sight of their ever growing children. I'll go so far as to admit I feel that way when I look at my boys. But this little miracle girl of mine produces much different feelings. Most people agree that conception and life itself is a miracle. But some instances produce wonders above and beyond an already blessed and beautiful event. My daughter's conception is one of the times in my life when God spoke to me. HE let me know not only that I was pregnant, but that SHE (I was informed that I was having a girl ) was being born to fulfill a specific devine purpose. Her journey her was full of struggle. A physical attack from an insane demonic woman, complications requiring monthly ultrasounds, and a dramatic emergency entrance that almost claimed both of our lives. "They" say, nothing good comes easy. I say truer words have never been spoken. So, every year when this date rolls around my heart is consumed with complete and total gratitude. I call her My Sunshine. She is an exceptional girl. We recently moved. Her transfer brought tears to the eyes of not only her friends, but her teacher, the school secretary, and even the principal. She's that beloved. This past Friday I had an opportunity to have a lengthy conversation with her new teacher. She went on to tell me how exceptional she thought My Sunshine is as well. She complimented our parenting skills at which point I had to concede. I wish I could take credit for all that she is, I admitted. But the fact of the matter is that, the special little person you see is just who SHE is. So as I wrap up this day and look across the room at my beautiful girl enjoying some of her new birthday treasures, I give thanks not only for a baby girl....I mean big girl who's growing up. I give thanks, acknowledge, and embrace the larger purpose which brought her here in the first place. I continue to yield myself as a guiding light who will usher her to a greater purpose for as long as God sees fit to use me. And I'll try to contain my excitement as I wait for said events to unfold. Peace and Love friends.
Tuesday, March 10, 2015
My world was turned upside-down a few days ago. There's nothing like the sudden untimely death of a loved one to bring your world to a screeching halt. As fate would have it, this happened during a time when I'd already began taking stock of where I am with 2015's accomplishments and failures. I guess I can only be thankful that I was open mentally and spiritually to hear and accept all truths. When life throws you for a loop, and then jams leaving you hanging upside down, don't react to it. Accept it and then figure out the proper way to get yourself turned right side up again. So that's what I'm in the process of doing right now. I'm not going to struggle. I'm going to hang here and figure out the best way to move forward when I'm back on my feet. I trust the truths I'm leaning will only bless and enhance my future. After all death is a part of life. It's how you handle death and the aftermath thereof that matters. I'll be fine. I'll gain insight. Life will go on. And God knows I'll be grateful once I'm standing tall ready to proceed.
Sunday, March 1, 2015
I've made enough mistakes for 2 people... maybe even 3. It's been a decades long struggle to get over some of them. Today suddenly I'm ok. With all of it. I am suddenly ready to let go and move on with my life. The life I've chosen. The life I'm actively building. A life I want. Just like that. I won't pretend that this has been an easy journey. Even years ago when I decided when I was ready for a change. When I began to make strides toward letting go of the things in my past. It was a struggle. Cutting strings, letting go, reassigning the level of significance of previously important people and experiences, has caused me to redefine my life. I can finally say it's been worth it. I can finally say I love myself enough to have a fulfilling life. I'd list everything I've done to get to this point. But it's a journey that looks different for everyone. My hope for everyone is that they love themselves enough to do the same. Peace and love friends.