Monday, October 12, 2015
A Quitter SOMETIMES Wins
Never SOMETIMES Wins
I recently watched a movie about a group of executives working on Wall Street. They were a very tough motivated brainy group. These individuals spent their time trying to stay one step ahead of the market, their competitors, their clients, and even each other. The relationships with their clients and one another were very calculated. Each person initiated into their group had to be capable of bringing a compatible skill set. And said skill set had to be mutually beneficial.
One particular scene that stood out in my mind was a game of cat and mouse in which one of the main characters was attempting to keep a client on hold and handle other business. The person sat there unhappy threatening to disconnect. He knew that he had been classified as less important. I thought to myself in that moment, he should totally hang up. This man was very careful with his decision. He wanted to see what would benefit him most. In other words was it advantageous for him to continue the relationship? Or was he so low on this brokers priority list that there was no benefit and him staying any longer.
I think these general principles can apply on a much larger scale. I believe that we must evaluate our relationships as they change. If it comes to a point in which you find yourself as a low priority to the other party is it worth it to continue the relationship? We know that as time goes on connections either strengthen or weaken. So it's important to evaluate where you are and what adjustments if any need to take place.
There's nothing worse than having someone attempt to force a friendship or relationship on you. I've been there in the past where people have tried to bulldoze their way into my life. It took some time, but I believe I've learned how to set boundaries with those I'm not interested in having a close personal relationship with. Likewise, I've learned to read the cues of those who are not interested in developing a close relationship with me. Every so often I've misjudged when I've been placed in a seat lower importance in someone's life. However, I've learned to read those circumstances pretty well; even if someone is not comfortable being honest and admitting that their life or interests have taken a different direction than mine.
I can say with absolute certainty, in the end you'll never regret moving on from someone who didn't care for you as much as you care for them. In fact, it's a complete waste of time to put energy towards someone who doesn't particularly care about maintaining a relationship with you. All you're really doing is wasting your time, and distracting your self from being with people who actually value you.
So when you find yourself in the position as the gentleman from my original example, weighing the cost of whether you should hold on or disconnect, take your time and respond don't react. Make a mature decision. Sometimes it's best to hang it up. Sometimes you quit AND you win. Peace and love friends xoxo...